XI ‣ always.

To Kennedy,

My spellbinding warrior.

My (intelligent, cunning, loyal, brave) little witch.

To your Ravenclaw brain,

And Sytherin wit.

To your Hufflepuff heart,

And Gryffindor spirit.

I wish you another year brimming with adventure, magic... Mischief! And as you turn the last page of Ten to embark onto your Eleventh chapter, I hope you continue to live beyond the margins - and make for yourself, a life worth retelling:

"You sort of start thinking anything’s possible if you’ve got enough nerve."

- Ginny Weasley, The Half-Blood Prince

One of my favorite things about you is your drive. You set a goal, you make a plan, and you execute it. When you falter; you're quick to adjust and try again. No matter the stakes, you always keep pushing: bigger, faster, stronger, higher - without fearing the fall down. I hope you never lose this. I hope you maintain your grit and maintain your nerve. And I hope you know, without pause, that I will always be in your corner. You be the kite and I’ll be the line, baby.

“I solemnly swear I am up to no good.”

- Fred Weasley, The Prisoner of Azkaban

Hold onto your sense of wonder! Keep playing! Eleven is not too old for dolls or bows or make-believe. (Thirty-one isn't too old for those things either).

"It does not do well to dwell on dreams and forget to live."

- Albus Dumbledore, The Sorceror's Stone

There will always be things you wish you could go back and change; and it's okay (and good!) to look forward and dream your dreams... But your Now is infinitely more important. Live in it. Be present. Soak in your surroundings and these flighting moments. It takes a lot of effort, but when you live your days with intention; you best prevent future regret or disappointment. Did you choose your life or did you settle for it? Ask yourself this frequently, and make sure it's the former.

No good sittin’ worryin’ abou’ it. What’s comin’ will come, an’ we’ll meet it when it does.

- Rubeus Hagrid, The Goblet of Fire

Tears are messengers of overwhelming grief and unspeakable love; and scars remind us where we’ve been, but they don’t have to dictate where we are going.

"Thoughts could leave deeper scarring than almost anything else."

- Madam Pomfrey, The Order of the Phoenix

Scars remind us where we’ve been, but they don’t have to dictate where we are headed. Just like the ones on your body, scars on your heart are a natural part of healing - and if you're still triggered by something, that means you haven't fully healed yet. Pay constant attention to your thought process, **give absolutely no allowance** to those discounting it, and refuse to be gaslighted when they say: "You shouldn't feel this!" or "You shouldn't think that way!" Being denied the right to feel will often scar you more than the feeling itself. Your reaction will frequently be wrong. Your vantage may warrant adjustment. But your feelings are YOUR feelings and you're entitled to feel (and express!) every last one of them.

"It takes a great deal of bravery to stand up to our enemies, but just as much to stand up to our friends."

- Albus Dumbledore, The Sorceror's Stone

Stay true to yourself and your moral compass. Set firm, non-negotiable boundaries. Then hold yourself, and *all those around you to them. (Yes. This includes me). Many people prefer to present themselves infalliable. These are not your people. Wave your beautiful, flawed flag high and be an advocate for what is right, even when it means telling someone you love that they're wrong. These will be some of the most difficult conversations you'll ever have; but you'll both be better for it.

"Differences of habit and language are nothing at all if our aims are identical and our hearts are open."

- Albus Dumbledore, The Goblet of Fire

Find people who share your morals and goals and aspirations; the one's who see the bigger picture. These people will come in different shapes, and sizes, and walks of life - but these are your people! Find them, and love them hard.

"Every human life is worth the same, and worth saving."

- Kingsley Shacklebolt, The Deathly Hallows

You've known true pain, and in many ways, you've been put through the wringer. But, darlin' - you've still got it good. Be mindful of those who don't. Be gentle when something comes easier to you than it does to others. For every ounce of skill you've worked for - you match (or triple!) in the raw talent you just so happened to be born with. So use it for GOOD. Use your voice and your influence to stand up and speak up for the little guy. "To whom much is given, much is expected."

"It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are. Far more than our abilities."

- Albus Dumbledore, The Chamber of Secrets

Be a neighbor, hold the door, put back your shopping cart, tip well. Treat people better than they deserve and leave things better than you found them. Be the highlight of a stranger’s day. Remind others through your actions, your kindness, and your character that good still exists.

"To the well-organized mind, death is but the next great adventure."

- Albus Dumbledore, The Sorceror's Stone

View the moments between your milestones as the chapters of your existence, and afford yourself the grace required to grow with each and every page. We don't know what will come next; or how long our book is. We don't know how or when or why our story will end - but we cannot allow our fear of the unknown take control of the narrative. You are the author of your life, and if you write it well - your legacy will live beyond the epilogue. That legacy is our only promise to heaven.

"We are only as strong as we are united, as weak as we are divided."

- Albus Dumbledore, The Goblet of Fire

I've got your back. Even when you're unreasonable, even when I'm disappointed, even when I know you're wrong. I'll go to bat for you. I'm in your corner. I'm on your team. And we're in this together. Foreva' Eva.

"Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on Earth should that mean it’s not real?"

- Albus Dumbledore, The Deathly Hallows

We are so much more than our bodies or actions; we are, above all else, our thoughts... So try your best to think good ones! Sounds simple enough, right? But it's not. This *impossibly simple concept is what it means to be human. It is our experience and it is our condition. You are infinite potential - and hold within your thoughts every single possibility. So go inside your head and think big! Dream up dreams and other worlds and magical people and inventions and places. Thoughts are things and every single tangible thing you see bore from one of them.

"I mean, it’s sort of exciting, isn’t it, breaking the rules?"

- Hermione Granger, The Order of the Phoenix

You should always know the rules, but that doesn't mean you should always follow them. Weigh the consequences. Know which to uphold, which to bend, and which to break. (Also, plausible deniability. Also, I never said this. Also, if anyone asks, you're afraid of the stretching room).

"I am what I am, an’ I’m not ashamed. ‘Never be ashamed,’ my ol’ dad used ter say, ‘there’s some who’ll hold it against you, but they’re not worth botherin’ with."

-Rubeus Hagrid, The Goblet of Fire

The better, stronger, prettier, smarter you are - the bigger target you are to criticism. Some people simply won't like you; others will actively search for reasons not to. They will magnify your flaws, minimize your strengths and size you up and down, looking for confirmations of their own bias. Drown them out and be yourself! Your nerdy, strange, witty, sarcastic, sensitive, caring self! And never be ashamed because someone doesn't see, value, or care to understand you. (Remember what we always say: Those people aren't your people.)

"It matters not what someone is born, but what they grow to be."

-Albus Dumbledore, The Goblet of Fire

You were born in difficult circumstances and have been subjected to so many things no child should ever have to witness or endure. Despite this... And despite your awareness of this - you've grown to be resilient, forgiving, and decent. Continue to be. Pour your decency into everything you touch. How much better to be known and remembered for your decency, than your beauty or charm or even your brain? Continue to be a leader; and lead with your heart, quiet strength, and unwavering character.

"But you know, happiness can be found even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light."

-Albus Dumbledore, The Prisoner of Azkaban

Seek the positive. Even in the most grim of circumstances, seek it out. Retrace those hard times you've already moved past - and remind yourself of instances where not getting what you wanted ended up leading you to something better. Remember with gratitude all the lessons you learned from failure, or defeat, or betrayal. Recognize how these dark moments served to increase your threshold for pain. Find humor in the irony. Comfort in the grace. And whenever possible, examine the other angles. "Sure, this was tough/bad/hard/painful, but without it, I wouldn't have learn/met/done/seen......" There is always a way to finish that sentence, so finish it!

"Don't be stupid. We're coming with you. You said to us once before that there was time to turn back if we wanted to. We’ve had time, haven’t we?”

–Hermione Granger & Ron Weasley, The Sorcerer's Stone and The Half-Blood Prince

We were born self-interested and as small children, weren't aware of why we loved: we were hungry and fed; dirty and changed; upset and consoled... We formed our first bonds based on basic needs; and only grew to love for other reasons as we developed the ability to empathize and admire. "I love this person for their intelligence, or humor" versus "I love this person because they take care of me." And at first glance, this evolution might seem more substantive, but never undervalue those who are simply there for you when and how you need them. Believe me when I say there is no greater source of strength than knowing you have someone you can count on. And this source of strength is truly everlasting. So please - place proper value on those who consistently show up. And more importantly, allow them to do so. It is absolutely okay to need somebody, sometimes.

"And now, Harry, let us step out into the night and pursue that flighty temptress, adventure!"

-Albus Dumbledore, The Half-Blood Prince

Terry Crew once said, "success is the warmest place to hide" and it resonated so, so deeply with me. Be careful not to overvalue the advice or direction of the conventionally successful. Are they happy? I mean really, earnestly happy? If not, why would you ever listen to them? Take risks, keep pushing, and carve your own path. Your dreams are YOUR dreams and they don't have to make sense to anyone but YOU.

"Dark and difficult times lie ahead. Soon we must all face the choice between what is right and what is easy."

-Albus Dumbledore, The Goblet of Fire

I know sometimes it is easier to push down your true feelings or opinions and just let people think what they want to think - But every now and then, you have to call a spade a spade. When forced to chose between "right" and "easy" - always, always, always choose "right." No matter the cost. No matter the backlash. For these are the choices that truly define you.

"Harry, suffering like this proves you are still a man! This pain is part of being human … the fact that you can feel pain like this is your greatest strength."

- Albus Dumbledore, The Order of the Phoenix

To love at all is to be vulnerable; and pain is little more than a testament of caring. There is no shame in caring, and so, there is no shame in pain. (And it's certainly preferable to not caring at all, is it not?) So, when you're wronged and feeling foolish - remember that love is vulnerability. Claim your pain, unabashedly... and keep on loving, anyway.

"It was important, Dumbledore said, to fight, and fight again, and keep fighting."

-Albus Dumbledore, The Half-Blood Prince

At times, you will feel defeated, outwitted, misused, mistook, misled. Keep swinging. Things arent always gonna come easy. Keep pushing. Sometimes it will take a second, or third, or a hundreth try before you get it right. Keep trying. When you get knocked down, get back up. Fight, and fight again, and keep fighting. Don't let anyone take the fight outta you.

"If I thought I could help you ‘by putting you into an enchanted sleep, and allowing you to postpone the moment when you would have to think about what has happened tonight, I would do it. But I know better. Numbing the pain for a while will make it worse when you finally feel it."

- Albus Dumbledore, The Goblet of Fire

Close your eyes and imagine sustaining a stab wound. How much does it hurt? Will you survive? And if you do, how long will it take to recover? These answers depend on variables, Kennedy - many of which, are in your control: How much blood did you lose before you acted? Did you tie off a tourniquet? Call out for help? Stitches? Surgery? And afterwards, did you rest, and keep it clean - or did you allow it to get infected?

Take care of yourself, and give your emotional wounds the same attention. Was it intentional or an accident? Victimized, or self-inflicted? New or reopened? Don't dwell on skinned knees - but don't bandaid deep gashes. Recognize which to butterfly, and which to amputate. The deeper the heartache, the longer the recovery; and ignoring the pain won't stop the bleeding. The most guarded ones usually have the most to guard, but if you don't clean it out and let it heal, it will only fester. (Lastly, and this should go without saying.... If someone keeps stabbing you, stop handing them the knife back).

"Words are, in my not so humble opinion, our most inexhaustible source of magic, capable of both influencing injury, and remedying it."

- Albus Dumbledore, The Deathly Hallows

Watch your step and watch your tongue. You've a way with words you haven't quite grown into.

Harness yourself. Words can wielded as shield, sword, or swathe. Whenever possible, choose swathe.

"You're a little scary sometimes, you know that? Brilliant ... but scary."

- Ronald Weasley, The Sorcerer's Stone

Head to toe, my sweet girl, you are comprised of iImmense gifts, powerful curiousity, and a fire of enormous ambition.

"The world isn’t split into good people and Death Eaters. We’ve all got both light and dark inside us. What matters is the part we choose to act on. That’s who we really are."

- Sirius Black, The Order of the Phoenix

Your habits create neurological circuits, far easier to write than to erase. Do not practice what you do not want to become. The future you depends on this.

"It is my belief…that the truth is generally preferable to lies."

- Albus Dumbledore, The Goblet of Fire

We all wear masks, but stray too long in inauthenticity and there will come a time comes when you can’t remove them without removing your skin. Remember, for every good reason there is to lie there is a better reason to tell the truth. It really is that simple.

"You think the dead we loved truly ever leave us? You think that we don’t recall them more clearly in times of great trouble?"

- Albus Dumbledore, The Prisoner of Azkaban

Memorize the wonderful nuances of those who believe in you. When times are hard, recall their smile in the front row of a packed auditorium; their voice on the phone at 2 a.m.; remember their "I'm not going anywhere" hands and their "We'll get 'em next time" arms. Tap into them; hear the things you need to hear; and say the things you need to say. You are not alone; you never were.

"Things we lose have a way of coming back to us in the end, if not always in the way we expect."

- Albus Dumbledore, The Order of the Phoenix

Have faith in the process and detach yourself from the outcome. Some of our greatest joys are born from the ashes of unrealized expectations.

"Not my daughter, you bitch!"

-Molly Weasley, The Deathly Hallows

Samaire: The Dawning Sun. You were born in such a dark cloud and lit up my sky. You threw me on my axis and since day one, my world has revolved around yours. You’re my moon and stars. My wind, my seas. The gravitational pull that draws me back to center. And when I see you hurting, it splits me seismically to my core...

A mother’s love is an unspeakable force of nature, Kennedy. It's a love that causes you to stop and take stock of who you are. And so much of who I am is your protector. I hope you never doubt that I've got your back. I will defend and stick up for you. And I will safeguard your heart, fiercely and without pause. This will never fade. (Try me).

"If you want to know what a man’s like, take a good look at how he treats his inferiors, not his equals."

- Sirius Black, The Goblet of Fire

Hope is quite possibly the strongest of man-made powers. But here’s the thing; it almost always takes more than one person to create it - for to have hope, you must have a goal - and you must someone who believes it in. Don’t stop believing in the people you love. Be their source of strength, and their source of hope.

"Until the very end."

-James Potter, The Deathly Hallows

I have advocated and believed in you since you took your first breath, and I will continue advocate for and believe in you until I take my last. Until the very end.

"'After all this time?"

- Albus Dumbledore

"Always"

- Severus Snape, The Deathly Hallows

Always, baby.

Always.

Stay hungry, stay foolish. Tu es mai joie de vivre.

#hbdkennedysamaire #stayhungrystayfoolish #tuesmajoiedevivre